Saturday, April 9, 2016

You know I have finally figured it out......Ted Cruz is A Rod.



I was listening to the Yankees this afternoon and that worthless fuck A Rod hit a home run to give us a 1 run lead. Then it hit me. I couldn't put my finger on it. No not my junk. I have big hands. I couldn't put my finger on why the more I found out about Ted Cruz the less I like him. Then it came to me like a thunderbolt.

Ted Cruz is A Rod.


Seriously. They are the same guy. Both have great statistics. On paper they should be the guy you want to get on your team.  But once you sign them the problems start. Nobody likes them. They are not team players. They just turn everybody off. They are extremely self righteous. Ted is the most conservative man in the world. He never compromises. A Rod says he works out more than anyone. I mean Paul O'Neil and Bernie Williams and Derek Jeter worked out a lot but they don't tell every single reporter every single time about it like they reinvented the wheel.

They both have feet of clay. At least allegedly. A Rod touted his workout regime as the reason for his success. Then we found out he was taking performance enhancing drugs. Ted offers himself as the morally perfect Christian candidate. Then we find out that he was taking performance enhancing whores into his bed. Allegedly. I know, I know there is no "hard" evidence. He can't come into a cup so we can know for sure one way or another. But as Yolanda Foster often opined on the "Real Housewives in Beverly Hills": "Where de smokes deys fire."

A Rod is finishing his run as a Yankee. They can't trade him. They are hoping to make money off of him as he chases the Home Run record. It is a cynical business decision. But I will never root for him like I did when he first came to the Yankees. I will never cheer for him the way I did before I got to know what he is all about.

Ted Cruz might be the nominee. If he is I will vote for him. It is a cynical decision. He has to be better than Elizabeth Warren or Joe Biden or whoever the ultimate Democratic nominee will be. But I can never root for him the way I did when he first came to the Senate. I will never cheer for him the way I did before I got to know what he is all about.

Sometimes you end with A Rod on your team.

8 comments:

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

In his defense... Ted Cruz has not dated Cameron Diaz.

Trooper York said...

Maybe. But he allegedly porked Katrina Pierson. That's way worse.

edutcher said...

We know Daddy is paying people on talk radio and the blogosphere to spread his propaganda. He's doing it in collusion with the man he called a liar on the Senate floor, Mitch McConnell, and possibly in violation of campaign finance laws.

We've seen him trying to poach delegates from both Trump and Rubio and we've seen the dirty tricks he's played. Now he's actually breaking the rules, trying to steal the delegates due Trump as the winner of the MO primary. The MO primary rules state the winner of each Congressional district got 5 delegates and 12 went to the State winner. Trump won the state by 1700 votes, but because the man who did the certification was a Cruzzer, he delayed the certification (Hillary beat Bernie by 1500 votes and was certified the next day). Now they're trying to find a way to steal those delegates.

I seriously doubt I could ever vote for Cruz for dog-catcher. I wouldn't vote Demo, but Cruz is so untrustworthy no one in the Party apparently trust him and I can see why.

It may be moot, I doubt the One True Ted will get the nod, although he seems to be trying to doublecross McConnell and Co. But, then they're going to triplecross him. Puffington says it will be Kasich/Rubio (yeah, me, too). But we now know why Ryan is cutting statesman-like ads.

Don Surber calls him the Cuban Obama. Actually, he's running for the title Cuban Stalin.

edutcher said...

PS For those interested, the MO rules.

Chip Ahoy said...

(Attention! Français parlé abondamment ici)

He's an asshole, nobody likes him, not a team player, willing to mess everyone up to advance his agenda, willing to shut down the government to drive his point. SOLD! I'll take a dozen. Please. Stop selling so hard already. He meets and exceeds all my desired qualities and qualifications.

But you know what? I'm very cross about Colorado shutting out Trump supporters. All the discussion that I've seen by party loyalists is dismissive. always so very boring especially when they're excited. Why didn't Trump invest here, then? Why don't you get involved in the process, then? Why not become a delegate yourself since you're so cross? Why don't you learn how things are done and then do them?

Why don't you blow me?

I lived here longer than anywhere and it wasn't until right now that I discovered Colorado Republicans do things this jackass seriously non-representing way. Why do you insert middlemen? We know why. Why not a regular voting system? Don't answer cost, we know why. Why not another straightforward and inclusive system that is not so purposefully exclusive as this? We know why. Why so difficult? For Christ's sake, we know exactly why. Why a system that benefits insiders? We. Know. Why. You're fucked in the head miserable control freaks, all A-types to a person, and arrogant, that's why. What the fuck is so wrong with you that you cannot see your own damage? What is your problem with rep-re-fucking-senting? Seriously, what IS your problem with straightforward representation? We know what. We're done listening, done taking orders, done falling in line. Your approach is to shoot your own stupid club in its own stupid loser foot! Both stupid loser feet. You don't want any more team members. You're telling everyone to piss right along, and believe me, we will. You expect them all to fall right in line behind you again, caterwauling it's all on the line again, and believe they will not fall in line. Colorado Republicans, you arrogant cunts, you just destroyed yourselves. Take a bow. Nobody, NOBODY want to be in your ridiculous non-representing club.

(I warned you about the liberal French spoken with abandonment here.)

All this is actually okay with me. I'm not in their club. And either bastard works for me. One a little better for destruction of all this (and more) than the other. One who can disregard all these exceedingly dreadful party apparatchiks a little bit better, rather that working earnestly from within them and thus perpetuating their structure and prolonging its long overdue death.

edutcher said...

Chip Ahoy said...

But you know what? I'm very cross about Colorado shutting out Trump supporters. All the discussion that I've seen by party loyalists is dismissive. always so very boring especially when they're excited. Why didn't Trump invest here, then?

OK, I'm proceeding from a point of some ignorance here (when did that ever stop me?), but it was my understanding CO did their delegate selection similar to WY in that it was caucuses of county party machines, not a vote by the people. Cruz sent in his minions into WY and got 2/3 of the counties and I think the same thing happened here.

April had something to say on the subject and how she was bummed by it a couple of months ago, but I can't find it

edutcher said...

Looks like Paul Manafort is earning his pay already.

The Evil One is beaten at his own game in MI.

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

When considering politics in 2016, I find drinking helps.