Friday, February 19, 2016

"Monkey in Brazil drinks rum and chases bar patrons with knife"

The capuchin monkey drank remnants of cachaça, a distilled spirit popular in Brazil, from glasses around the bar. The animal then chased the men in the pub with a foot-long knife but left the women “to drink in relative peace”, according to the Mirror.
“It was a bar staff oversight that ended with the monkey drinking some rum and taking the knife,” fire department Lt Col Saul Laurentino told aRede.

20 comments:

Adamsunderground said...

Mafioso monkey should always remember to "drop the knife, and pick up the guacamole."

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Donald Trump was heard complaining... "Everybody wants ta get inta the act!"

Chip Ahoy said...

You saw the gif of the crab with a paring knife? *finds* Jesus. There's a lot of them. Crabs all over the place with knives. The live lobster in the sink has a chef's knife.

If it were America the monkey would have a gun.

deborah said...

Awaits Trooper's Rubio joke.

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

My first thought was, is this South Carolina?

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

If it were America the monkey would have a gun.

I finally read that lecture you linked to the other day. It was fascinating, like i thought it would be.

Thanks.

ricpic said...

"...it was a bar staff oversight...."

And what if the monkey had done what comes naturally and chewed a bar patron's face off?

Hey, maybe something good will come out of the idiot affection for monkeys. Like Justin Bieber's face being chewed off. He collects the things. How do I know? One of the unfortunate consequences of reading the British tabloid press.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Now I'm going to stop the amn on the street and tell them to read it ;)

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

One of the unfortunate consequences of reading the British tabloid press.

I clicked on a tweet of an ISIS beheading and it wasn't censored. I knew I shouldn't have done it, but I still did it.

AllenS said...

From the article:

The capuchin monkey drank remnants of cachaça, a distilled spirit popular in Brazil, from glasses around the bar. The animal then chased the men in the pub with a foot-long knife but left the women “to drink in relative peace”, according to the Mirror.

What an asshole. Was it a female monkey?

Amartel said...

The monkeys at the rock of Gibraltar have adapted to the humans as well. They ride up the hill on the tops or backs of cars (hilarious to see a monkey solemnly seated on the top of a cab) and they pick pocket the tourists. Monkeys: They're just like us!

Amartel said...

Allen, Allen ... who hurt you?

deborah said...

Ricpic is a royal watcher!

Joe Biden, America's Putin said...

Go monkey go! Feminism is winz.

ricpic said...

"Ricpic is a royal watcher!"

Those twits? Hardly. I read the Brit tabloids because they don't flinch at reporting the total corruption in "the colonies," that would be us. As opposed to our own castrated press.

Trooper York said...

In New York we are having a rash of monkeys stabbing people lately.

One of them stabbed a busboy who told him to stop begging in the restaurant.


chickelit said...

As summer approaches, I'm becoming curious about cachaça.

Any recommendations?

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Any recommendations?

Don't take a knife to a gunfight is always advisable.

deborah said...

Don't let Cookie anywhere near it.

MamaM said...

I read the Brit tabloids because they don't flinch at reporting the total corruption in "the colonies," that would be us.

Same reason I read them. I don't watch the beheading videos however, as the picture of the pilot being burned alive in a cage still haunts me.

In the "crabs with knives' category, still shots of knives being publicly wielded in the hands of the small minded, drunk with power barbarians, pictured in The Daily Mail article about the 15 year old who was recently executed for listening to Western music are impressive but on second look bear a closer resemblance to crustaceans with chef's knives.

I used to keep a carved set of the three "Hear no evil, See no evil, Speak no evil" monkeys on a bookshelf, but put them in a drawer two years ago. The time for speaking truthfully about barbaric behavior of the brutal, barbarous, brutish, bestial, savage, vicious, wicked, cruel, ruthless, merciless, villainous, murderous, heinous, monstrous, vile, inhuman, infernal, dark, fiendish, diabolical variety is now.