Monday, July 20, 2015

Sixties Sitcom Subtext Theatre



When Tweety Bird first burst on the scene, she caused a sensation in Cartoon Town. The Avian community was enchanted by her sweet and wholesome sex appeal. Many of Cartoon towns Lothario’s rushed to hit on her. Senator Foghorn Leghorn offered her a job as intern with the Foreign Relations committee in the hope of some more personal relations. Tommy the Toucan kept sending her boxes of cereal and telling her he would eat pecans out of her shit, he loved her so much. Daffy Duck stuttered even more than usual when he tried to ask her out. But she spurned all of them as she wanted to stay chaste until she married. Her father Billy Ray had been a one hit wonder and was watching out for her and keeping these pigs at bay. But then one day, she met Top Cat. And all bets were off.
(Tweeting My Ass Through Tinseltown, The Tweety Bird Story, By Tweety Bird, Warner Brothers Pocket Books, 1989)

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