Monday, October 14, 2013

Happy Columbus Day!



Happy Thanksgiving Canada. This commemorates the day the Pilgrims landed at Nova Scotia where a colony was established and where the friendly indigenous people welcomed the the pilgrims with open arms and shared with them survival secrets on how to endure and thrive during the harsh Northern winter on poutine, a savory dish of root vegetable cut into strips and fried in oil and covered cheese curd, shredded cheese or slathered with molten cheese and various sundries like beans and chili and gravy and onions and such and the pilgrims were all, "Wow, why didn't we ever think of this?" But this has to do with harvest thanksgiving not discovery.

And apart from them and the US, the whole rest of the New World learned Spanish upon discovery except for a big chunk that leaned Portuguese and celebrates something else entirely. Look, I didn't conflate these things, you did.

20 comments:

I'm Full of Soup said...

Pure Genius Chip!

I'm Full of Soup said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
john said...

I love maritime themes.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

A barrycascade.

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

The First Nation people shared with the Europeans the gift of hockey. And pumpkins. And corn.

The Old World people shared the gift of fermentation, distilling and diabetes.

AllenS said...

Happy Columbus Day, Chris!

rhhardin said...

In the year fourteen hundred and ninety three
Columbus sailed the dark green sea.

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

In the year 1491, Columbus did not sail anywhere fun.

AllenS said...

Little known historical fact... Chris sailed to find a short cut to India. When he first saw Indians, he said... "What the fuck?"

ndspinelli said...

AllenS, Were they the Werethefuckawe's?

Icepick said...

If the Redskins, er, Native Americans, had a more effective system of barricades, they might still own the joint.

Trooper York said...

No the Native Americans sold out for twenty four dollars.

They were the first Rhinos.

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

Look. I'm all in favor of giving the indigenous people their due.

But there's simply no getting around the fact that -- when it comes to Thanksgiving -- it was the Europeans who introduced canned cranberry sauce that comes out in the shape of the can with the ridges and everything and all that entails.

You know what I'm trying to say here?

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

Oh, shit.

Wrong holiday.

Oh, well.

Nevermind.

Chip Ahoy said...

No, Eric, it is the right holiday. They have that cranberry sauce there too. Also apple pie. There's a saying up there, "Canadian as apple pie," and then Johnny Appleseed came along and started introducing invasive apple species all over the place by eating a steady diet of apples until basically he pooed applesauce and turned into an apple seed spitting machine and he eventually became totally ace at spitting the seeds like a gun directly into mud
*pi-tewey! pi-tewey! pi-tewey! pi-tewey! *
He was totally ace at hitting his mark every time and could line a whole street with seeds. And so it developed throughout the lands of New York, Pennsylvania, Ohio, mostly, that whole leafy, flowery, fruity avenues sprang up in his wake many hundreds of such lines of trees having taken hold and in recognition of this insane careless action well before appreciation of native species took hold these streets are named Johnny Apple Streets but most of them were later changed to Martin Luther King Blvd, the trees ravaged and dead only a few survive.

Joe Biden, America's Putin said...

In celebration of Columbus day, I paid all my quarterly taxes.
Later, the Republican Senatorial Committee called me again. They want money.
I picked up the phone and yelled - "Figure out a way to get rid of John McCain, or you will
never receive any of my money ever again."
Then they hung up on me. Sweet. Happy Columbus day.

Joe Biden, America's Putin said...

Treat mom to a margarita this Columbus day. Remember - you're the reason she drinks.

edutcher said...

Even the Indians did better because of Columbus (unless you think always killing each other was a good way).

Now you have to be an urban Democrat to live like that.

Methadras said...

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

The First Nation people shared with the Europeans the gift of hockey. And pumpkins. And corn.

The Old World people shared the gift of fermentation, distilling and diabetes.


I don't know, Indians sure did like their alcohol and chocolates.

Methadras said...

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

The First Nation people shared with the Europeans the gift of hockey. And pumpkins. And corn.

The Old World people shared the gift of fermentation, distilling and diabetes.


I don't know, Indians sure did like their alcohol and chocolates.