Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Cops: "Man Found Dead In Car Had Just Googled His Symptoms"

DETROIT (WWJ) A man was found dead in the parking lot of Grand Valley State University and police are searching Internet records to determine what killed him.

The body of the man, in his late 30s, was found inside a parked car. He wasn’t a student, but he had been inside the school shortly before he died.

The symptoms were pain and tightness of the chest and sweating.

“Maybe he thought he would just lay down for a minute and feel a little better, but unfortunately he  passed away,” Merrill said.

Police believe the death was from natural causes.

CBS Detroit

11 comments:

edutcher said...

No, it's germ warfare.

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

If there were a kind and loving God, the guy would have died slumped over the steering wheel blaring the horn.

ndspinelli said...

Sounds like a plot from House.

betamax3001 said...

Tightness of Chest, Sweating, Not Wearing Pants. A Box of Kleenex on the Passenger Seat. He Had Thought About It, Fantasized, Dreamed,for So Long, and Now -- Now, He Was Ready: Air Bag Sex. With the Special Seat Covers.

Would There Be Fulfillment? Disappointment? Shame? Oh, Airbag, Wanton Repressed Airbag: He Would Be Gentle.

The Car Pool Members in the Back Seat Could Only Watch: This Was For Him Alone.



Icepick said...

No good place to put this comment, so I'll put it here.

I would be more impressed with Ted Cruz if instead of Green Eggs and Ham, he had read Fox in Socks. Everyone knows that's the real challenge of Suessian oratory.

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

He should have called 911 and gone straight to the hospital.

Icepick said...

He should have called 911 and gone straight to the hospital.

COme on, Fox in Socks isn't THAT difficult.

Joe Biden, America's Putin said...

A good friend of the family died recently. A cancer survivor. He was on his way up to Black Hawk, but he only made it to Golden. He felt terrible and so he admitted himself into the hospital. He died 3 days later. He was only 60.

(Not related to the cancer)

Chip Ahoy said...

Man: Siri, what's wrong with me? I feel like I'm dying.

Siri: Let me look that up for you, Man. (pause) Oh, Man, It appears you are dying.

Icepick said...

LOL @ Chip's comment!

Methadras said...

It's Detroit. No need to google your symptoms of what is going to kill you there.